The power of identity
Our identity is like a lens through which we choose to look at ourselves. It's a representation of who we think we are and even who we think others expect us to be.
Our identity is like a lens through which we choose to look at ourselves. It's a representation of who we think we are and even who we think others expect us to be.
I am not what I think I am, and I am not what you think I am. I am what I think you think I am. – Charles Cooley
We can hear clues about what makes up people's identity by listening for "I am."
I am a teacher
I am a parent
I am a lazy person
I am a leader
I am a good student
I am a carnivore
I am a shy person
I am a business owner
I am a coder
All these identities come with qualities, strengths, expectations and limitations. When we cling to our identity and cannot see ourselves separate from it, we fall prey to only what's permissive within it. We do whatever we need to stay true to it.
For instance, take someone who may want to impact their field, make their mark and share their knowledge, but has always seen themselves as a shy person. If being a shy person is who they believe they are, they are likely to be held back by that identity.
Transitioning their identity from being shy to being someone that appreciates their alone time to reflect can enable them to create a new identity where they can also be influencers in the areas they wish to impact.
The identities we create and hold come from our cultural upbringing, parents, friends, role models, as well as the values and beliefs that surround us. They are neither good nor bad; we simply have to recognize that they exist and be able to step back to see ourselves independently from them.
We are more than the identities we hold. We are not just a teacher, a leader, a mother, a shy person, a responsible person, an introvert, a coder, a business owner, etc.
We are any or all of these. Let us not limit ourselves the same way our identity sometimes does.
We have the power to choose and change our identity over time.
What impact has your adopted identity had on your ability to achieve your goals and take action towards your dreams?
Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.
Totally agree about the values and beliefs that surround us: I think that our society (western, for guys at least) uses identity as the means of starting new relationships. Isn't the first thing most people ask someone they've just met "what do you do?" And it's really interesting to think about what your answer is to that if you no longer define yourself as a coder/introvert/etc...
Great article as always, Miguel! :)