Why This Distinction Matters

Whether you’re an organizational leader, a potential client, or a professional navigating your career, knowing when to seek mentoring versus coaching can significantly impact your development. Misunderstanding these roles can lead to missed opportunities and suboptimal outcomes.

Defining Mentoring and Coaching

Mentoring typically involves a senior individual guiding a less experienced person by sharing knowledge, advice, and insights based on their own experience. It’s about transferring wisdom and cultural understanding from one individual to another, often within the same organization.
Coaching, on the other hand, is a collaborative process where a coach facilitates self-discovery and growth. The coach helps the client unlock their potential, focusing on generating insights and cultivating greater self-awareness without necessarily offering direct advice or solutions.

Addressing Common Misconceptions

I recently addressed this question on LinkedIn: What do you do if your skills need a boost? One of the first responses offered was to seek mentoring, often seen as the default approach to skills learning. While mentoring is a valid and powerful tool, it’s essential to recognize that it’s not the only option regarding personal and professional development.

Take, for instance, this video of a politician who views mentoring as a more affordable alternative to coaching. While mentoring is indeed more accessible, it doesn’t mean it’s a substitute for coaching or that it serves the same purpose. Let’s delve deeper into why these roles are distinct by examining two critical aspects: the nature of their relationship and their focus.

The Nature of the Relationship

The nature of a mentoring relationship is that of an expert/learner or senior/junior. The mentor brings years of experience, knowledge, and understanding about a subject matter or organizational know-how—often referred to as "how we get things done around here." It’s a supportive relationship aimed at helping the mentee learn and develop through the mentor’s experience. However, because of the inherent differences in seniority, these relationships are often intertwined with a power dynamic. This dynamic can limit trust and openness, as the mentee may hesitate to share openly out of concern for retribution.

In contrast, a coach’s role is to create and maintain a safe container for deeper self-reflection on the client’s work challenges. The coaching relationship is one of equality, free from power dynamics. The client is encouraged to express themselves freely, without fear of judgment or reprisal. Unlike mentors, coaches don’t need specific knowledge about the client’s working environment. The relationship is centred on collaboration, with both parties working together to achieve the client’s goals.

Understanding the relational dynamics is essential, but equally important is how these roles focus on different outcomes. Let’s explore how mentoring and coaching differ in their objectives and approaches.

The Focus of the Role

Mentoring focuses on transferring knowledge and cultural understanding of the system from one individual to another, typically from a senior to a less senior person. The primary goal is to enhance learning and performance within the existing system. Mentors provide advice, share opinions, and tell mentees what they need to do to succeed.

Coaching, however, is focused on generating insight, cultivating self-awareness, and developing competencies through practice and exercises aimed at helping the client accomplish what matters most to them. The International Coaching Federation defines coaching as "partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential."

Facts are essential, but sometimes, a story helps get to the essence of the matter. Let’s explore the differences using a metaphor.

A Juggling Act

Imagine you're a skilled professional poised for a promotion but need help with prioritization. You reach out to a mentor or coach for guidance. Using Nora Roberts's metaphor of juggling balls—where some balls are glass (critical tasks), and some are plastic (less critical)—here’s how mentoring and coaching differ:

Mentoring: A mentor within your organization will teach you the moves of a Juggler. They will help you learn to recognize which balls are glass and which are plastic. They will draw from their experience to guide you in identifying, prioritizing, and handling these tasks effectively. They will teach you to act as a Performing Juggler who confidently navigates the challenges of your role, knowing which balls to focus on.

Coaching: On the other hand, a coach will help you first identify your current approach. They will explore how you prioritize tasks currently—what your approach looks and feels like, and how it impacts your work and life. They will help you discover how you currently operate, which might be, for example, as a Dedicated Pool Player, focused intently on sinking one ball at a time, without fail, but unable to adapt quickly to shifting priorities.

Then, they will help you understand the strengths and limitations of this approach and guide you toward becoming a Dynamic Juggler capable of adjusting on the fly. They would support you in developing the mindset and skills needed to juggle glass and plastic balls with greater flexibility and effectiveness.

The Key Distinction: While a mentor teaches you to operate as a Glass and Plastic Ball Juggler, a coach helps you become one. Mentoring focuses on imparting knowledge and offering advice based on experience. Coaching, however, is about transforming your approach, enabling you to internalize new ways of prioritizing and performing.

This metaphor illustrates the difference: mentoring is about learning from someone else's path, while coaching is about discovering and forging your own.

Key Differences at a Glance

Mentoring:

• Involves knowledge transfer from a more experienced to a less experienced person.

• Provides advice and guidance based on the mentor's experience.

• Often includes a power dynamic due to differences in seniority.

Coaching:

• Focuses on self-discovery and personal growth.

• Facilitates insight and competency development without giving direct advice.

• Represents an equal, power-free relationship centred on the client’s goals.

Conclusion: Choosing the Right Approach

Both mentoring and coaching are powerful tools, but using them interchangeably can lead to less-than-ideal outcomes. Next time you're faced with the challenge of developing talent or addressing a professional hurdle, consider whether mentoring or coaching is the right approach. Understanding these differences will help you make the best choice for achieving meaningful, lasting results.

Mentorship is invaluable for transferring senior knowledge and experience to more junior counterparts. However, we must be clear on the desired outcomes before choosing between mentoring and coaching. Any confusion will result in poor outcomes and dissatisfaction. By focusing only on mentoring as the cure for all needs, organizations risk wasting time and resources while missing the more profound benefits of coaching.

Have a great Sunday and a wonderful week.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

All powerful coaching programs stem from a deeper yearning for something in life that has yet to be fully cultivated, whether professionally or personally. Here’s a simple yet profound question to help guide you:

What have I been longing for more of in my life/work?

Take a quiet moment, delve deep within, and connect with any parts of yourself that have felt lacking, longing for something more. Fully allow yourself to be open and honest. This question focuses on uncovering the deep yearnings that drive meaningful change.

Begin to answer the question with:

“I want to be more able to…”

As a way to be inspired, consider these examples:

I want to be more able:

• To create moments of calm in my busy life.

• To say no even when yes feels like the only option.

• To stand up for myself despite discomfort and fear.

• To value and express my unique beauty.

• To cherish family time despite a heavy workload.

• To engage more readily in tough conversations to support my team better.

• To delegate work, be more hands-off and create a culture of growth in my team.

• To act with ease despite uncertainty.

• To show myself more self-compassion and care.

• To prioritize my health & fitness

So, what are you longing for in your life? Reflect on this question—it might just unlock your next coaching breakthrough.

I'm here to support you when you're ready to explore this further. Let's embark on this journey together.

Have a great Sunday and a wonderful week.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

What can you tell me about the style of writing that Miguel Lavigne uses in his Sunday Spark issues?

ChatGPT responded:

Miguel Lavigne's "Sunday Spark" newsletter features a reflective and conversational writing style. He combines personal anecdotes with insightful observations, encouraging readers to engage in self-inquiry and personal growth. His tone is warm and inviting, often using metaphors and relatable stories to illustrate complex ideas. Miguel's approach is designed to inspire curiosity and challenge readers to think differently about their lives and goals. The content is structured to provoke thought and offer practical takeaways for personal and professional development​.

Seeing ChatGPT describe my writing style as exactly what I aimed to achieve was a revelation. For two years, I wrote consistently without truly knowing if I was meeting my goals. It took an AI to validate my work before it could sink in.

Reflecting on Internal Measures of Success

This revelation made me reflect on why I couldn’t see my success while I was in the midst of it. Why did it take an AI to validate my work so that I could believe in its impact?

I realized that my internal measures of success were misaligned with my actual achievements. My self-assessment was based on immediate feedback and visible outcomes rather than the deeper, more subtle impacts of my writing. This misalignment created a persistent sense of inadequacy despite evidence to the contrary.

The Importance of “Ways of Checking”

In Integral Coaching®, we talk about “ways of checking” – how we make sense of the world and ourselves through internal questions. Poorly constructed internal questions can lead to feelings of inadequacy and persistent striving.

In a nutshell, how we make sense of the world around us and within us is supported by how we check whether the world is operating the way we expect it to. This process can be supported by questions we ask ourselves to test whether the world functions how we expect it to. When expectations of our ways of checking differ, challenges ensue.

The subconscious and internal ways we check on the world support our beliefs, which in turn drive our actions. Our internal questions (or ways of checking) often come from growing up and aren't as helpful anymore.

We must shift how we check and make sense of the world.

Daily Reflection Practice

To help you uncover this unconscious process, as a small practice, take a minute every day to reflect on one or two moments of your day and try to notice a part of yourself speaking to yourself. Observe the type of messaging that is going on within you. Pay attention to any of the questions underlying those internal messages.

It might have sounded something like:

1. Did I work hard enough today?

2. Was I tough, able to show absolute strength?

3. Did I completely exhaust myself today?

4. Did I accomplish everything I set out to on my list?

5. Did I do more for others than I did myself?

6. Was I appreciated and seen by the people I care most about?

7. Was I accepted by my peer group?

8. Did I feel safe?

9. Did I learn something new or gain a new insight today?

10. Did I make meaningful progress toward my long-term goals today?

If you find yourself answering these questions with a "no" daily, consider how they might drive a cycle of dissatisfaction or constant striving within you.

Instead, try asking yourself:

What new question could I ask that would give me the space to approach this differently?

Moral of the Story

So, what's the moral of the story? Well, I might not have become T.S. Eliot or Voltaire, but I managed to create great pieces of writing, and I deserve to appreciate myself for that. Perhaps a great tragedy is never recognizing how great we already are.

So, if you're not accomplishing what most deeply matters to you or you find yourself never fully appreciating what you already do and who you are, consider reflecting on the type of questions you're asking yourself.

Have a great Sunday and a wonderful week.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

I have a juicy idea, and I need your help.

You know that feeling when you come out of a conversation with more energy than you went in? I met two wonderful friends last week on separate occasions. These were the kinds of conversations we had together. We touched on heartfelt and vulnerable topics ranging from profound personal challenges across business, career and family life, and we also explored topics purely for fun, such as board games, great books, and good coffee.  It was a yin and yang of fun and depth, all wonderfully sprinkled together.

If given the chance, wouldn't you love to experience more of these conversations? For me, that's an absolute yes!

It's funny; in one of these conversations, a friend shared some wisdom they once received: "The best way to expand your network is to connect with a million people and form new connections." That makes sense, right?

Before she said it, I hadn’t realized how much I'd love to do this. Hence, I’ve decided to embark on a mission to connect with as many individuals as possible, learn from them and share some fun and profound moments with them. I'm calling this the Sparking New Connections Experiment.

What does this experiment entail?

This experiment aims for me to connect with someone new every week, learning from them and sharing profound and enjoyable moments. And what better way to kick off this journey than right here with all of you?

If you'd love to connect for a 60-minute conversation, consider the opportunity yours—I want to hear from you.

The only requirement for this experiment is to show up to the conversation with an open heart, a willingness to learn about someone else, and an openness to share about yourself. Oh, and be willing to have a few laughs, too.

Whether you're in North America or somewhere across the world, this experiment transcends locale. It will be hosted on Zoom, making it more accessible to everyone.

To simplify the process, I've created this link, which opens up a consistent slot in my calendar every week for anyone to use to schedule a chat. Initially, it's a narrow time frame to make it easier to manage—I might adjust it later depending on how it goes.

I'm In!

You may find this idea captivating but are still determining what you would talk about. First, let me say there is no right or wrong topic to discuss. This is an open format for now so that we can be creative together. But in case it helps, here are a few questions to ponder.

• What are you doing (personal, professional, or business) that you are most excited about, and why?

• What has been one of your biggest life challenges (that you're willing to share), and what impact has it had on you?

• What is your favourite thing to do when it's raining and you're not working?

• What has been your favourite book this year, and how would you describe it in just a few sentences?

• What's your favourite way to spend your downtime?

• What would your best friends say is your most beautiful quality, and how has that quality been at the core of how you got to where you are, if at all?

• What do you do for work, and would you change it if you could?

So, will you join me on this adventure? Can you spread the word to others? I'm keen to make this experiment a success.

I hope I hear from you, but before I forget, this isn’t just for people who don't know me. Of course, I want to hear from you even if we know each other because we can always learn more about a person.

If the proposed times don’t align with your availability, but you would be interested in connecting, reach out to me directly, and I'll do my best to find a suitable alternative. Respond to this email or contact me through my website using this form designed specifically for this experiment.

Let Me Get In Touch First

Let's widen our reach, broaden our horizons, and learn from each other beyond our usual circles. I'm thrilled about the prospect of meeting exceptional individuals and eagerly await our conversation.

Will you be the first?

I'm In!

With love and gratitude.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

This post is a little longer than usual, but if you're still here and curious, let's get into it.

A small update

Many of you know my work as an Integral Coach™—I have even had the honour and pleasure of working with some of you, something I dearly cherish. For those who are new here—there are a few of you—I want to welcome and thank you for joining. For that reason, it might be worth a small introduction.

My name is Miguel. I have a 15-year career in the software development industry, engaging in roles ranging from Software Developer to Manager to Director of Engineering. Today, as a second career, I work as a developmental Coach and engage with and empower leaders to journey beyond their current ways of being and harness their fullest potential.

It's exciting and rewarding work. I love what I do, as it gives me a chance to journey with the most outstanding people on their authentic quest to create lasting change within themselves as a way to enable them to have the impact they want and reach the outcomes they care about most.

In very exciting news, earlier in May of this year, I completed my Integral Master Coach™ certification, the third and last module of a rewarding, profound and deeply transformative coaching program with Integral Coaching Canada, a nearly five-year journey for me. This accomplishment represents many years of experience, coaching training, dedication to personal development, and my continued commitment to delivering the best coaching services to my clients.

The Need for Greater Emotional Capability

There's a discrepancy between the speed at which the technological-economic base evolves and our cultural and personal worldviews.

Technological change is adopted much quicker. New technologies rise and fall constantly, and some change the fundamental landscape of humanity. The industrial revolution of the 1700s and the informational shift of the 20th century are great examples. Perhaps artificial intelligence (AI) is one of the most prominent examples of a change that is happening quickly and reinventing, in some cases, how we do things.

Paradoxically, human development and cultural change happen much more slowly. While new ways of doing things can more easily be adopted— like switching from using a plow to working with a machine in a factory or from a factory to a computer—our values, beliefs, and preferences lag behind. This creates tension between the more advanced technological base available, their innate impacts and problems, and the more complex thinking required to hold and engage with these productively.

You can read more about this phenomenon in this recently published essay by Ken Wilber. You will need a subscription for access.

I want to point to one (of many) essential and fundamental capacities we must cultivate within ourselves to provide us with what we need to deal with the constant changes happening around us: emotional capacity—also known as emotional intelligence.

A highly developed emotional capacity means the ability to increasingly become more self-aware and recognize emotions, learn to regulate and manage them, and better understand and interpret them within ourselves and others. This leads us to use emotions to think better and develop more profound and authentic relationships. We can think of it as a set of layers, where each layer allows a deeper, richer and more compassionate appreciation for our emotions, the emotions of our neighbours, and the rest of the world.

For example, we can recognize a level of depth in people by noticing their capability to be with pain without the need to push it down, deny its presence, or try to get over it. To be with and hold pain is a true sign of emotional maturity.

Modernity and the business culture we most often see in our organizations don't fully acknowledge the value of being with pain and emotions. The more common approach is the policy that emotions are better left at home. 

This approach is well-intentioned yet misaligned. Leaving a core part of who we are outside of where we spend most of our time—at work—doesn't lead to more rational thinking and performance. Instead, it creates a disconnect from our bodies and emotions, a source of deep and powerful intelligence greatly needed for us to perform.

Perhaps we can begin to recognize that what we once understood as the best way of doing business is evolving, and what worked yesterday will no longer be enough today and requires shifting for a better tomorrow.

An initial step we can take to begin our development in this area is becoming aware of the polarity between emotional expression in the workplace and emotional restraint and recognizing what is gained and lost by overemphasizing one at the detriment of the other.

See the upsides (top half) and downsides (bottom half) of each pole of this polarity below:

The answer isn't to choose one side over the other but to integrate both in a holistic, more comprehensive and mature way, benefiting from the upside and mitigating the downside in a healthy fashion so we may experience the deep and powerful transformation and impact of emotions in the workplace without losing sight of the productive nature we seek within our organizations.

In my experience as an Integral Coach™, one of the areas I most often see as needed when clients come to work with me is developing the link between their mind, body, and heart in a way that allows them to continue to engage, produce and perform while maintaining a deeper and heartfelt alignment with their whole self.

Beyond the workplace, life is full of difficult and challenging events and experiences that we are just not okay with. This might look like the various wars happening across the world and the injustice of who lives and dies as a result, or the loss of a loved one to a horrible disease or act-of-god accidents. It's okay not to be okay with these.

A deeper, richer, healthier relationship with emotions allows for a more subtle distinction: while we are not okay with all of it, we are more capable of being with it.

In which aspect of your life could you begin to notice the value of having better emotional awareness, and what impact would that have on your ability to engage more fully and productively?

Please share what came up for you in the comments.

Coaching Opportunity

I'm currently taking on a few coaching clients. If this speaks to you, you know someone, or you're currently sensing you're at a crossroads and could benefit from looking at a circumstance through different lenses, please reach out to me; I'd love to hear from you and discover what it is that you seek, and how I can help.

Have a great Sunday and a wonderful week.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

If you found this post interesting, you’ll also enjoy this one.

We find ourselves already deep into the first month of this new year. Wow, time flies.

I mentioned a few times late last year that I was working on various projects. I want to share one of these with you and ask for your help.

Unsurprisingly, having crucial conversations is getting increasingly difficult in the current landscape. Whether with family and friends or in our organizations with co-workers, we engage in topics ranging from the best ways to raise our children, to politics, to what technology to use in our software product. These many conversations quickly become unproductive debates, affecting our ability to make change happen. That’s not even counting the social media platforms we visit that quickly become toxic environments where making sense of an issue is nearly impossible.

I’m sensing that many of us are recognizing the struggle and looking for new ways of relating to and approaching this issue.

This very real challenge inspired many writing pieces late last year. I am passionate about a more holistic, encompassing and integrated way of relating to these difficult conversations, honouring the various—often polarizing—worldviews so that we can begin to engage in productive dialogue to make change happen.

Here are a few examples:

• Contradictions

• The many truths of reality

• Facts, experience & social responsibility

• Honour today for a better tomorrow

• Leading from the inside

I’m working toward creating an offering in the form of a training, course, or group coaching program—the format is undecided—that would focus on helping us make sense of why conversations are so difficult and polarizing. It would aim to build the skills we need to support us in having crucial conversations in our organizations (as well as in the privacy of our own homes), leading to higher degrees of performance and understanding.

How can you help?

Initially, I’m looking for input from you—regardless of any role you do or don’t occupy— to understand better what you see as some of the most important issues regarding engaging in crucial conversations.

If this project speaks to you, please take 30 seconds to provide your contact info using this form, so I have the necessary information on how to reach you.

If you see value in this initiative but don’t have any time to contribute, you can still leave a positive comment below and/or like this post. It’s always great to see when an idea resonates.

Lastly, if it does resonate, please help spread the word by sharing this post or form with friends, family, and co-workers. I would be forever grateful.

Thank you; have a great Sunday and a wonderful week.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

Undoubtedly, many of you, including myself, are preparing for the holidays: wrapping gifts, preparing food and adding finishing touches to give the space the most energizing holiday vibes one can hope for.

For me, this time of year is a time of love, gratitude, and blessings. And let's not forget the non-stop holiday music streaming on our home speakers and car radios. Some might cringe at how much it plays in this household, but we love it!

As I prepare for everything to come, I also can't miss that the end of the year is upon us. While I never recommend waiting for it to take a moment to reflect, it presents an opportunity if you haven’t consistently reflected throughout the year.

Here's a simple one. What are you grateful for?

As I reflect on mine, I’m thankful to be privileged to have a wonderful family: parents and a sister I love and a wonderfully supportive partner, Amanda, whom I love very much too. This year was exciting and challenging; I'm sure it was the same for many of you.

I'm also grateful and want to share my deep appreciation for everyone on this Sunday Spark journey. Your attention is precious, and I don't take it lightly. Thank you for always allowing me to share the various reflective thoughts and ideas dancing in my mind. It means a lot to me.

Life always presents in ebbs and flows. It’s a sine wave of intricate and beautiful events stitched together in ways we most often can’t imagine. Yet, these present themselves in moments that offer us continuous growth opportunities.

We can start to recognize when those growth opportunities are knocking at our door: they challenge us and often humbly reveal that our current approaches to our personal, professional and/or business lives may no longer be structurally sound if we want to thrive.

These are always some of the best opportunities for self-reflection and, more importantly, self-compassion. It is part of life to face periods where we feel ill-equipped for the challenge. That is precisely how human development works. By adopting self-compassion, we allow ourselves to acknowledge our current limits and make space to reflect on what we might need to do differently moving forward, the first step to making a change.

The alternative is sticking to what we know and doubling down, which keeps us feeling like we're in control, but, unfortunately, has the reverse effect we are looking for: it stunts our developmental growth and keeps us from becoming more whole and capable of more complex thinking and being.

We're all moving through our different challenges, dealing with circumstances we never thought we'd have to face. Giving ourselves and others the gift of compassion might be the best thing we can offer.

I'm hopeful for the future, even though it might seem and feel grim at times with everything that is happening. There is still much beauty all around—we must choose to look for it—and the opportunity to shift things in ways perhaps unimaginable right now. I have an inkling that 2023 will present many more opportunities for growth as a species.

I look forward to writing some more here in the new year. The various projects I'm working on will surely inspire some interesting thoughts and ideas. Thank you again for reading.

As always, I love hearing from you. If you are yearning for something new this coming year or have noticed one of those challenging opportunities for developmental growth, please get in touch; I want to hear from you.

Have a great end of the year and a fantastic holiday period: much love, gratitude and compassion to all.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

I’ve started working on my master-level coaching certification, which has taken much of my time. I did Module 1 and 2 a few years back; they were delicious trainings and have been the foundation for my coaching work. But if I may say, Module 3 has been richer, juicier and even more exquisite than I could have imagined. The following seven months will be filled with exciting deep learning as I continue refining my skills as a developmental coach. 

If you are curious, the developmental coaching methodology I use with clients to help them create the change they seek to make and reach their goals is from Integral Coaching Canada, located in Ottawa.

And without further ado.

A simple yet profoundly challenging concept to master is the concept of reality.

Reality is hugely malleable; it takes different forms depending on the perspective through which it is viewed and experienced.

According to integral theory, we can categorize each perspective into increasing orders of complexity from 1st-person, 2nd-person, 3rd-person, to 4th-person, and so on.

In sticking with the first four perspectives:

The 1st-person perspective focuses on the self only. Their reality accounts solely for their needs.

The 2nd-person perspective focuses on the self and others in the context of a family, group, team, tribe, community, country, nation, etc. Their reality accounts for the needs of others that belong to the same collective.

The 3rd-person perspective focuses on all of us, which goes beyond the self and the collective. Their reality accounts for the needs of everyone equally and universally.

The 4th-person perspective can reflect on all the previous ones, see partial truth in all of them, and bring them together in an integral way. Their reality allows for taking in what is valid for all realities.

Every moment, every breath, every experience and circumstance is perceived through these lenses.

The 1st, 2nd, and 3rd-person perspectives see their reality, their way of looking at the world, as the only true and correct view.

It doesn't take much to realize that two people perceiving the same event from these different lenses can lead to conflict, differences of opinion, and even sometimes, oppression.

As leaders, the trick is to recognize our gap and choose to develop our abilities to take on more complex and rich perspectives, and eventually, conclude that every view contains a bit of truth and validity, and only by honouring all these truths instead of denying them can we move on to solving our most complex problems.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

It's experienced and felt at the macro and micro levels.

It might look like our organizations as they strive to improve their efficiency and move quickly to adopt new systems, processes and tools.

Or the manager who lays out the exact steps they believe their report needs to take to get to the next level.

And also, the best friend that tells us what they think we should do and what worked for them.

Change happens in many forms, but sustainable change occurs when we first acknowledge and honour the current way.

It's the current way of being that got us where we are. It's not wrong! It just may not be what's necessary anymore, given where we are going.

As we grow and continue to unfurl, our goals and ambitions evolve, and so do the challenges we face, and what got us to where we are is often different from what will enable success where we are headed.

Honouring ourselves and the people we seek to help is the first step to enabling sustainable change.

Nobody wants to be told they are wrong and offered a "better" way.

But everyone seeking to improve is open to discovering how their beautiful current way might limit them on their journey toward something new.

Honour today for a better tomorrow.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

Everyone’s reality processing mechanism is unique: our life experiences, how we make meaning, the values we hold, and the goals we set are different.

It becomes a problem when we impose our reality on others without further reflection.

Imagine we’re all-powerful computers with exceptional processing capabilities (thoughts, emotions, reasoning, etc.). As life happens, our systems take in information through various input mechanisms: hearing, sight, touch, taste and smell. 

Inputs are processed into outputs. Our mistake is assuming that everyone processes information precisely the same way and generates the same outcomes. 

The truth is that while we have similar hardware, we all run slightly different software code versions.

Many have experienced challenging bugs in their lifetime, for which they have adjusted their running software to adapt and continue to develop.

Alternatively, some have merely forced the inputs of reality to match their codebase in a fight to remain the same, regardless of the faults it creates.

Opening ourselves to new perspectives is like testing a new code module that offers an alternate way of processing, evaluating and executing the inputs we’re getting. It’s a chance to see and experience life differently and adapt our software to generate new, innovative and often better results.

Let us not confuse our outputs with reality; it is only a synthesized variation of inputs.

Instead, let us ask how we might improve our modularity to better connect with other systems and enhance everyone’s experience of reality.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

It brought something to the surface that we tend to forget. Everything we do, intentionally or unintentionally, has an impact and creates a ripple in the web of life. To lend a hand, offer a supportive comment, and even write weekly.

These little acts, done consistently, find their way around. We tend to forget about them because it’s easier to believe only what we see. But fear not; you matter, are valuable, and have an impact. Choose wisely!

Thank you, Christianne, for the opportunity to get to know you. And to everyone who reads this, please reach out, ask questions, offer comments, or even just say hi 👋. I always enjoy hearing from and connecting with all of you.

There are two ways we can get what we want.

We can fight for it, a common choice in business and organization culture, also sometimes referred to as hustling.

The fight option gets the job done, with a few downsides.

It's energy-intensive; it slowly depletes our ability to continue showing up.

It quickly clouds our judgement and ability to see any other possibility—we lose ourselves.

It distances us from people who do not see our way.

It slowly degrades our ability to be ourselves, appreciate and enjoy what we do.

Fighting serves the purpose of the system itself. It pegs us against each other; it teaches us that happiness and making it are scarce resources we can only get if we fight for them.

Another way is flow. Flow is using the existing momentum and directionality of things to our advantage, turning challenges into opportunities, and leveraging existing forces and energy, so we don't have to fight inertia.

Flow leaves us feeling energized. It teaches us that we can choose to make the best of what we are presented with at every moment. While not always easy, it’s certainly more fulfilling.

Flow is around us all the time. When we tap into it, it's abundant and unlimited.

We can turn the loss of a job into a new career focus. The failure of a project into an inception idea for a new one. The transformation of a mistake into a learning opportunity. A setback in our lives into a reflection of what we truly want.

There's always a choice. When a door closes, look for a window.

Or you can always choose to break down the door; the choice is yours.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving. Please enjoy a wonderful long weekend with friends and family and many moments of love, joy and support.

At home, when cooking in the kitchen, you don’t clean every utensil, plate, pot and pan the second you use them. Nor do you let the dishes accumulate in the sink for days.

Instead, you tackle the dishes after dinner or, better yet, start the dishwasher when it’s full.

At work, when leading your teams, you don't nitpick everyone's behaviours when they don't match what you want as soon as you see them. Nor do you let issues and poor behaviours accumulate and share feedback only at the end-of-year review.

Instead, you create a feedback culture where regular feedback is expected and find just-in-time opportunities to discuss behaviours that impact the outcome and the team.

As Seth Godin wrote, somewhere in the middle is the steady state of productivity.

Anything at the extremes leads to crises and breakdowns, not breakthroughs.

The same applies to our home and work relationships, decisions, finances, and health.

The magic is finding a balance that allows us to come back every day happily, do our best work, and make the change we seek while feeling energized and ready for more.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

There was a choice to make. I could fight against everything happening or choose to be with it and use its momentum and energy to my advantage, like a master Aikido practitioner, centred, present and moving with their opponent, not against them.

What helped was my complete surrender to what is. Having been laid off offered me more personal time. I took it as an opportunity to reflect on myself, be curious, and learn something new but with a different attitude, without needing a particular outcome.

It felt scary and yet exciting at the same time. I had a few ideas of what I might want to do, but I put those aside initially. I intended to have no goals, to wake up every day and be with my circumstances, not try to change them.

I took some time to read, exercise and do nothing. It exposed cracks in my identity facade. I heard and felt the parts of myself struggling with what I was attempting to do and pushing back. Voices like "you're lazy," "you're unproductive," and "you're useless" were loud. I felt emotions of fear, anger, frustration, and longing.

Over the years, I've done a lot of self-awareness work where what I hear and feel in my mind and body, at any moment, is something I can choose to notice and observe rather than cling and react to. It is certainly not a perfect process, and in many instances, I still find myself reacting to the moment and getting lost in it. Even then, the time between responding and returning to being an observer is much quicker than it used to be. This was a crucial skill during my surrender experiment, to observe and be with the loud parts of me, noticing them and appreciating them without needing to make them right or wrong.

Everything I did went against what society keeps saying we should do. Be productive, add value and work hard, work the 9 - 5, Monday to Friday; all things I wasn't doing, at least not from society's point of view.

Something interesting happened. Different parts of me, parts I hadn't heard of in a long time, came alive. Things that felt heavy suddenly started to feel light, energizing and fun again. Time began to slow down; it no longer felt like a resource that was running out. I started reading more, writing more and feeling overall more creative. Being creative had felt out of reach for me for many years.

By creating space, for which I mean not doing so much, parts of myself came online again. It would have been easy to say it's just who I am; I'm the kind of person who needs to keep busy to feel successful, appreciated and recognized. I'm just not creative and can’t read a lot.

We are capable of much more than we allow ourselves to think, see or feel. The challenge is that those parts are locked away, and busywork is the guardian that keeps them hidden from us.

This isn't a reflection of anyone's circumstances but my own. I will say that we often have more choices than we are willing to admit. Surrendering might not seem like one, but for those willing to consider it, surrender can transform us in ways we cannot begin to imagine until we experience it.

How did everything turn out?

I read a lot, much more than I ever have or thought I could. I finally dedicated more time to coaching individuals — work I'm passionate about — and working with fantastic leaders in their respective fields to create the change they seek to make. I started offering developmental training programs to groups, teams and organizations, something I had wanted to do for a long time; I'll share more later. My car was fixed; it turns out that what seemed like a dire problem was a dead battery. The gum graft went very well. And the final stages of my master-level coaching certification program start in two weeks.

It's compelling to think we have to make things happen as planned. That strength is defined by how willing we are to push through challenges. While that is one way, it's not the only way.

Leveraging the momentum of what is already in motion requires flexibility and adaptability, two crucial skills today. The best way we improve is by using every opportunity that presents itself. In the process, we might discover parts of ourselves we didn't know existed.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

More concerned with how we look, the power we have, or the respect we maintain.

Sometimes it’s the leader that clings to command and control simply because it would be too uncomfortable otherwise.

Other times, it’s the employee who works long hours and says yes when they should say no to feel accepted, respected or appreciated.

Or simply, it’s the friend who loses their temper when points of view challenge their worldview.

Carl Jung taught us that awareness of the self is fundamental to all positive interactions and endeavours.

There is no cure and no improving of the world that does not begin with the individual himself. — Carl Jung

The resources we need to solve our many-faceted problems live inside us, and the mistake we make is looking externally for solutions.

In a science-driven world, many cringe at the thought of looking within. It’s not objective or data-driven.

Every time we distract ourselves from the parts we are uncomfortable with, we diminish our connection to ourselves.

The more disconnected we are, the more struggles we face, and the harder we look externally.

Instead of being okay with not being okay, we try to manipulate and control the circumstances or the people around us in ways that make us feel safe.

It also leads us increasingly to distract ourselves rather than understand ourselves. It is similar to what the remote did for Adam Sandler in the movie Click. By constantly using the remote to skip uncomfortable life moments, the remote learned to automatically cut past any emotional life events, which led to missing many vital ones.

Hiding from the discomfort of emotions, pain and fear, the opposite happens; we create the perfect conditions for emotions to be in the driver's seat calling the shots.

We do not need to hide from pain and fear; we need to change our relationship with it.

Elizabeth Gilbert has a practice she performs before she tackles something that would bring up fear. Her point is that we want to move beyond fear, not eliminate it.

In the book Dialogue, William Issacs shares something David Bohm used to say. “If there is pollution in the river of our thought, then we have essentially two strategies we might pursue: removing the pollution from the river downstream, or changing something farther upstream."

Downstream, we build elaborate systems, tools, and gadgets to address pollution. Such changes allow us to evade responsibility for our actions and reactions and put blame externally. Downstream improvements are safe and don't require self-reflection or challenge behaviours or thought patterns. In contrast, upstream change happens at the source through openness, deep reflection, and curiosity. It takes responsibility for the pollution created and addresses it. This process is challenging, daring and courageous.

The thing is that leadership — leading oneself and others — starts within. No rightful change in the world is ever genuinely accomplished without first improving oneself.

The best way to strengthen our sense of connection with the self and others is by developing an okay-ness with tension and becoming curious about it instead of pushing it downstream, dismissing it or running away from it when it comes knocking.

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

But playing it safe doesn’t necessarily mean we lead productively.

We must accept and challenge what we know, think and understand; to do this takes courage.

Reality is decided based on what the mind can comprehend.

And decisions are made based on what the mind says is the truth, which is but a fraction of what is really true, possible or even accurate.

Here's a quote from Michael Singer’s latest book Living Untethered; it beautifully describes this challenge.

The only data the mind currently has is based upon its past experiences, so the mind always thinks it's right. This is part of the predicament. Please understand that your mind will always think it's right. The mind is not dumb; it knows what it experienced. But it doesn't know what it didn't experience—which is an infinitely larger body of knowledge. This is why the wise sage Lao Tzu reflected that a wise man does not argue—for what purpose? You have your mindset, and another person has their mindset. All their lifelong data says one thing, and your totally different lifelong data sees it differently. There's nothing you're going to do about that, except be humble enough to realize that at any given moment the data you are taking in is less than .00001 percent of whats going on everywhere. It's meaningless; it rounds to zero. In essence, you've had a whole bunch of zero-breadth experiences that add up to zero. The personal mind is so caught up in itself, it will never want to look at that truth.

Seeking to keep our worldview safe and fixed, we force, bend and shape the external world to fit our internal one. We demand others to conform to what the mind tells us is accurate, correct or valid, and we debate the validity of our reality over theirs.

Just as the fish isn’t aware that it lives in water and so doesn’t question its experience, the words our mind speaks are taken as facts, truth, and the only possible reality; we fail to challenge their validity.

We must develop the capacity to take on multiple perspectives and be okay with contradictions.

It turns out that when it comes to leading productively, we are much better off creating a reality together than imposing our own onto others.

Some of the most significant breakthroughs of human experience come from exceptional leaders challenging what is believed possible, not by force, but by envisioning a future that accounts for multiple realities. Nelson Mandela was instrumental in the slow dismantling of racism, going from an apartheid prisoner to South Africa's first black president.

To lead productively, we must go beyond ourselves and what we think we know and invite curiosity. We must seek contradicting points of view, open ourselves to what they offer and question what we might be missing. The more we develop this capacity, the more productive we will be.

And so, you can choose to lead safely or courageously; which one will it be?

Miguel,
Sparknotion — Think Differently.

Further reading

Sunday Spark

Don’t be too quick to judge

In many ways, the fear of what is different and misunderstood is at the root of many violent physical and psychological acts. "If a person’s behavior doesn’t make sense to you, it is because you are missing a part of their context. It’s that simple," writes Devon Price in…

Read more

4 years ago · 5 likes · Miguel Lavigne

Sunday Spark

Taking on more perspectives

Have you ever experienced a shift in how you viewed someone after better understanding the circumstances they were living through? Maybe it was an employee that was often late to work, which made you think of them as lazy and unprofessional. That is, until you discovered they had a sick family member they were taking care of on their own…

Read more

5 years ago · 3 likes · 2 comments · Miguel Lavigne

Sunday Spark

Contradictions

We are full of them. What we want, say and do are often at odds. We want to lead our teams and don’t delegate. We wish to be appreciated for our work and keep quiet about our most outstanding accomplishments. We want more freedom with our time and stay in jobs that require working long hours. We want to grow and don’t challenge ourselves…

Read more

4 years ago · 4 likes · Miguel Lavigne

This seems cultural; it’s experienced across gender, race and income level.

The struggle is that there is too much to do and not enough time to do it. And thinking, more precisely, reflective thinking, must take a back seat for us to keep up.

Educator John Dewey once wrote, “We do not learn from experience... we learn from reflecting on experience.”

The quality of our learning and our impact on ourselves and others is intimately linked to the quality and amount of self-reflection we do.

With no time to think and reflect, we do not learn; we are stuck with old thinking, repeating the same thought patterns.

Self-reflection is an underrated and most powerful skill. It's the process of asking oneself challenging questions, staying present, open and curious about what comes up.

For our experiences to be rich and dynamic — not repeating the same old patterns — self-reflection is crucial. Without it, no fresh thinking is possible.

Effective self-reflection requires another essential skill: self-awareness.

Self-awareness takes us to another level: it provides us opportunities to truly see and be with who we are, separate from the expectations and pressures surrounding us. It helps release the structures that limit our flow of meaning.

In a culture that predominately idolizes metrics, objectives, actions and results, self-reflection and self-awareness are often confused with fluffy and unnecessary practices that hold us back.

It turns out the opposite is true. Together, these skills are proven to increase our performance, which means their lack is a severe disadvantage. A life without these skills is similar to trying to express ourselves in a foreign language: we can get by, get ourselves heard and maybe even understood, but we will work much harder to get things done and get where we need to be.

These skills aren't necessary, but they are required to lead greatly. They are direly needed in our leaders, teams and organizations.

As long as we continue to cling to every second, we will have no time to think.

If you don’t know me yet, I work with leaders and high performers and help them deepen these skills so they may show up more fully, be happier and fulfilled, and perform better while tackling the change they seek to make.

Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.

A few responses to her tweet compared the commenter's age to Greta's. Here are a few examples:

Having been on this planet for over twice as long as you...

I recall 1976 …. Before you was born …

I'm 76 and you're still at school or something, aren't you?...

These commenters disagree with Greta on the climate crisis and point to their age to show they know better. Even when provided with facts by different commenters who shared infographics comparing the heat across the world forty years ago with today— these infographics clearly showed the difference; the world is much hotter today—their response was that science has been wrong many times in the past. Blinded by their experience, they are unwilling to consider other facts.

Experience is essential, but it can also deter us from seeing the whole truth. Experience is precisely that, our experience, which means it’s missing the experiences we haven’t had. It can be like wearing blinders and getting a limited view of what’s in front of us, not seeing the complete picture. It’s not helpful to let experience alone dictate our future.

Science has been wrong before, and yet we don’t give up on trying to gather more facts. A better way to look at science is holistically over time. And so, we make decisions based on the most accurate and current science available to us today. As science continues to evolve, so must our thinking and our decision-making.

To evolve our thinking, we must develop the ability to revisit past experiences and their inferred beliefs and challenge their validity; not all are true or valuable. There is no absolute right or wrong; there is only what we know today and what we choose to do about it.

A better way to make decisions and live our lives is to consider the three spheres of good decision-making: the facts and science — the objective truth — our experience and worldview—our beliefs, values, attitude, motivations, desires, preferences, emotions—and our social responsibility—ethics and morality.

A balance of these three spheres is crucial; relying solely on one devoid of the others creates more problems. Now more than ever, society tends to look at these as independent lenses, trying to sever the whole into parts. For example, in the twentieth century, science has taken such a stronghold in our thinking that many only believe what science can prove.

Our ways of thinking have become increasingly fragmented. Topics are more polarized than ever, challenging our ability to make good decisions and pushing us to debate and pick sides.

With climate change, many naysayers only focus on the parts that agree with their own experiences. They fail to look at this issue holistically. While we still have cold winters or cold weeks and days in the summertime, overall, when we look at the whole, we can see the climate trend is worsening.

Facts are rigid, observable and safe; they demonstrate their intent objectively. But facts powered by science don't account for all human capacity; they don't provide all the answers. Experience, knowing what is true for us, helps balance what science cannot answer. And it is also important to remember that beliefs and assumptions inferred from experience can often be flawed, and revisiting the facts is crucial.

We must also balance it all with a strong sense of moral and ethical responsibility. It’s essential to make decisions that go beyond just us, that are right and inclusive. Everything in life is part of an interconnected whole. A continued effort to fragmentize all topics and people into their parts separate from everything else only leads to more division and conflict.

Climate change is one area where the three spheres of good decision-making and viewing problems as part of an interconnected whole are essential. But what might happen if we brought this thinking into our businesses, politics, leadership, and relationships?

Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.

I invite you to look at The Carbon Almanac, the result of a worldwide effort and collaboration of people from different backgrounds, races and geography coming together to create change and share facts about the climate change issue. Help share the word.

Contradictions live within us, hiding in the shadows, invisible, often keeping us trapped from doing and being us.

Contradictions aren't just in us; they are all around too. They are on TV, in our movies, in our stories. A few include the left and right, capitalism and climate change, and consumerism and minimalism.

The contradictions we notice outside ourselves are hard to ignore; they parade and dance in our social media, news and, more importantly, our conversations. We feel we must choose one side and deny the other because it is safe, predictable and easy.

The alternative is more challenging. Allowing both sides of the conversation to be true, allowing space for co-existence without judgment, so we may further understand, requires effort, courage and a deep curiosity.

Our discomfort with contradictions leads us to our most pervasive form of communication: debate.

Debate is believed to be a primary way we get to the truth, yet here is the contradiction:

The root meaning of the word debate is to beat down. This means that one side needs to lose so the other may win. And often, the winning side is the most convincing, not necessarily the right one, and so winning by debate often brings a sense of false truth. And there lies the crux: debate forces a side; it inadvertently blinds us, and we fail to see beyond what else is possible.

With limited capacity for contradictions, we are at a crossroads where we must decide if we continue with more of the same.

Our truth is as valid as the next person's truth, even if these truths contradict each other.

With debate, we show up to impose our truth onto others, prepared with counter-arguments about how our point of view is better.

I want to propose a different path, adopting the meta-skill of contradiction, which involves learning to listen, suspend, respect, and voice.1

Developing the meta-skill of being with contradiction begins by:

• Learning to listen and be with the discomfort of contradictions without denying it and making it wrong.

• Suspending our default thinking, beliefs and preconceptions and catching our default reactive patterns to open ourselves to go beyond.

• Respecting the dilemmas, including the people presenting them, without choosing sides.

• Voicing what is valid for us without needing to make other points of view wrong.

By suspending our beliefs and preconceptions, listening to others and ourselves and voicing what still needs to be said, we begin to allow multiple points of view to co-exist. The result enables us to learn further about ourselves and connect more deeply with others in ways that aren’t possible otherwise.

Like everyone, I’m full of contractions too. I write these posts, and yet, I fail to operate purely within the bounds of my own writing. And nonetheless, that’s the point. To be okay with partiality, imperfection and contradictions. Allow them to be, and don’t forget that this writing might contradict your point of view. How will you choose to proceed?

Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.

Hypotheses are the assumptions of science; they are what we believe we understand about the data we observe. And then we work on validating these through a series of experiments. When we validate a hypothesis, we can make correct conclusions. And when a test invalidates a hypothesis, science has taught us to let go and start over.

The process of validation is often missing from the human experience. We take our experiences and make quick conclusions about what they mean, and move on without further validation. This dangerous process leads to adopting baseless beliefs to which we cling. Once invested, we biasedly look toward validating our assumptions, instead of testing their validity. This process is flawed and unconscious. As William Issacs says, "What we do not notice principally is the difference between a direct experience and our assessment of it."

Chris Argyris provides us with a model to better understand this process which is called the Ladder of Inference. Perhaps the most important aspect of this model is the reflective loop, how previously made conclusions and beliefs become filters for what we observe from future experiences. It means previous decisions impact what we pay attention to moving forward. In other words, we seek what aligns with our beliefs and unconsciously ignore what doesn't.

As this reflexive loop repeats and reinforces, we can start to see how narrow our beliefs can become and how stuck we are with them.

It turns out that it's much harder to let go of already formed beliefs than it is to slow the process of belief adoption altogether.

And so, as we continue to challenge our many limiting and often obsolete beliefs, it's also as crucial to slow down and take charge of the inference process.

Next time you experience something you may or may not agree with and find yourself about to conclude what it means, interrupt yourself and ask these questions:

• What are all the facts here?

• What assumption am I making about these facts?

• What am I missing? (be honest and curious)

• What am I choosing (unconsciously) to leave out from what I’ve observed because of prior beliefs?

• What else could this mean?

• How does this go against a belief I hold and how could it also be true?

When we let the process of inference run automatically, we operate as a hole digger. The hole digger chooses the best location to dig. They commit and get to work; the harder they work, the deeper they get. When they hit a plateau of hard rock, they’ve come too far to stop, there’s no going back. They double down and dig harder from side to side to find a way around.

Instead, we might adopt the way of the puzzle solver. The puzzle solver looks around for a valid spot for a puzzle piece they’re trying to place; they make assumptions about where they believe it should go based on shape and colour. As they continue to solve the puzzle, it challenges their original belief about where the piece should go, therefore, they adjust it to fit the new data.

When we cling to the beliefs and assumptions we hold, it makes it impossible to see beyond them and have any fresh thinking. Because we think it, it doesn't mean it's true.

The biggest mistake we can make is to believe we're puzzle solvers, when in fact, we are digging holes.

Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.

It's hard to imagine that it has gone this long. Not because I thought I would fail, but because when I started, I had no grand plan. I didn't have any big audacious goals or any specific metrics to reach a particular subscriber count or views per post, nothing at all. All I had was a clear purpose. I knew why it was important to me.

My goal was a selfish one. Yup, it was all about me 🤣. My focus was to discover what I wanted to write about and I didn't care who or how many people read it. It sounds harsh, but I promise, it's not meant to be.

Setting a selfish goal made one thing possible. It gave me control over a process that can easily become externally focused. It put me in the driver's seat, calling the shots, and deciding what to write. It didn't matter to me if some topics would attract more readers or if twice or thrice a week might be better for engagement and growing my subscriber list. It wasn't about any numbers; it was about what writing would do for me.

I found a rhythm that felt right and adopted a method that allowed me consistency every week to focus on what I found most interesting and kept me coming back. Perhaps that is the most important aspect of this approach. Instead of asking what I needed to do to write a blog, I asked what will enable me to write every week and keep coming back, happily, energetically, and effortlessly. The answer to that question is what I've been doing during these one hundred posts.

Paul Millerd writes in his book, The Pathless Path, about a very similar strategy regarding how he chooses to tackle life:

On the pathless path, the goal is not to find a job, make money, build a business, or achieve any other metric. It’s to actively and consciously search for the work that you want to keep doing. This is one of the most important secrets of the pathless path.

Selfish goals (better known as intrinsic goals) are goals that align with your values. They provide fulfilment, they are satisfying and keep you coming back. They are as much about the journey as the destination.

John P. Foreman writes in Integral Leadership (Highlights):

If we reflect on our own experience, we may discover that many of the goals we have achieved were unsatisfying. Were those based on our values or the values of someone else? The extent to which our goals and our values are out of alignment may be the most profound litmus test for our own feelings of worth, purpose, and personal success. This has many implications for leaders. The first involves our own career and life satisfaction. Until we have clearly defined our core values, we will most likely not achieve deep and lasting fulfillment from either our professional or our personal life.

Extrinsic goals have their place too. They are the goals we set in alignment with external rewards. For that promotion, that career or business advancement, or more wealth to live more comfortably. When you work for an organization, most of your goals are in alignment with the organization in exchange for a paycheque; they are not necessarily yours.

Extrinsic goals cannot be discounted but they also cannot be the only ones we set. Extrinsic goals provide an external reward but they don't necessarily drive purpose and fulfilment, nor do they automatically align with our values. What they provide is a short-lived reward.

When most of our life is driven by extrinsic goals, we're often left dissatisfied when we reach them. They deliver a dose of dopamine, of excitement for reaching them, and then nothing. We ask, what's next? And, we try harder, set bigger audacious extrinsic goals and get stuck on the hedonic treadmill.

Metaphorically, we can look at extrinsic goals as a cheap, inefficient and unstable energy source; they require a constant need for more to keep going. By comparison, intrinsic goals are a rich, clean and stable energy source; they keep burning and going with ease. Having a few extrinsic goals amongst a healthy number of intrinsic ones is a much more sustainable way of going.

Starting the Sunday Spark, I needed something efficient, something that would keep me burning and coming back, and so I chose to be selfish, and as it turns out, I'm still writing. 😀

I want to leave off with a thank you to everyone. Some of you have been here since the beginning. Some of you joined along the way. And to everyone, thank you for reading, commenting and sharing your thoughts with me, I always appreciate it.

Miguel,
Sparknotion – Think Differently.